Connection in a cabin

The beautiful moments of summer

The sweet moments of summer, the birds are chirping, the view of my

Daughter beaming as she kayaked beside me in her own boat while we tried our luck with fishing, the sun glistening off the water, the warm sun on my skin amd now the crackle of a campfire that she created and is tending to while I lay snuggled in a warm blanket on this swing by the fire.

So many times today I remembered summers past even as a child when I caught I wiff of the forest and felt the familiar warmth of the sun walking down a path.

There is nothing to do but play and delight in the simplicity of nature. For me to observe and witness joy in its simple forms.

A tad thankful I canceled our tent camping trip by the ocean and chose glamping where we will have a warm bed tonight and a hot shower.

Earlier I sat and pondered my own experiences being parented, what my reality was and just wrote whatever as it came up. I was surprised when I realized that my experience then had been part of my undercurrent as I experience life now. It amazes me how it’s all connected. I used to go through life believing everything is separate but it really isn’t.

I have very different conversations with my daughter. I reveal my reality and I welcome hers. Even when my Conditioning calls it rude. Even when it moves something uncomfortable in me. When I engage it she will often share her logic behind what she shares and it makes perfect sense. She is not malicious. She expresses her pure raw truth.

I wish I could go back and redo the hardest years differently. Yet I know that my experience of it all was necessary to move through each layer that I did to get here. She was the fuel to my fire that eventually transformed how I perceive it all. Without it, I would have never come to Discover what I have.

I wonder though, how she experiences her own reality with me being her parent. I also wonder if I am fully showing up the way I want to for her. I will catch myself correcting her to not do something and I know it’s habitual.

I want to slow down more so, to pause and engage and open more space. To show up and be really present. I suppose I am in many ways yet I know there is always more and it is never done. Not as an endless battle of not good enough, but rather always moving into curiosity for the more that becomes available as I slow down and allow.

Being a parent challenges everything inside of us. It offers us endless opportunities to Evolve past our conditioning. It means we can change our minds on all of it.

It brings us back to simplicity and what nature reflects.

It also directs us into our own fire into the places we were taught to move away from.

As I allow myself To Drop the strategies/ habitual reality I get to refuel it and choose to Stay in it this time. When I do so knowing I am literally shifting my undercurrent, I do so differently. A rush comes in through the pain. It digests and I am left with clarity. Sometimes that clarity is not what I thought I wanted, sometimes It means I need to choose differently but it never leads me to wrong . It leads me to my own truth and living in alignment. With out that I don’t get to be present and feel joy like I did today.

I want THAT for my daughter!